My dad, who is also British, lives a mile up the road from me. He’s lived in Los Angeles for almost 17 years, a full decade longer than I have.

When people hear his accent and ask “Where are you from?” he always answers “LA.” I never understood why he did that until very recently.

It’s because he’s from LA. That’s where he lives and when someone hears his accent, or my accent, and asks where we’re from they’re not really asking we’re we’re from. They don’t really want to know where we’ll be driving once the day is done and we head home. What they’re really saying is, “You’re not one of us. You’re different. What type of different are you?”

And often, it doesn’t matter. Because they know I’m English by nationality. My accent isn’t exactly subtle. It’s just a lever they can pull so they can talk about Doctor Who, Harry Potter, and that time they went to Europe in 9th grade and totally saw London and oh my god it’s such a great city I need to go back and visit sometime have you ever been to the King’s Head in Santa Monica pip pip I bet you get that all the time haha.

I completely understand why my dad doesn’t give people the answer they were expecting. Because ultimately the person asking doesn’t actually care. The question isn’t about us. It’s about them.

vaspider
darksigyn:

mattg124:

angrynerdyblogger:

straight-up-juggahos:

kendralynora:

buginateacup:

jaydenw:

whitepajamas:

automatonic-absinthe:

isaia:

rosswoodpark:

time-for-maps:

this changes everything oh my god

do you understand why it trips me out that people can drive 45 minutes and be in aNOTHER COUNTRY?I drive for 45 minutes and im like
a city over 

I live in “Italy” and took a day trip to go to “Austria” and “Germany”

 #it is literally impossible to leave texas #you will be in texas #FOREVER

Chums, that’s sweet, and all, but Australia just ate Texas for breakfast. 


If you drive for 45 minutes in Australia you aren’t a city over, you’re just 45 minutes away from the city.

If you drive for 45 minutes in Australia you may not even leave the cattle station.


If you drive for 45 minutes in Canada you may not even leave your driveway.

If I drive 45 minutes in the us I’m just at another mcdonalds

If I drive for 45 minutes in Northern Ireland I’m 10 minutes into the sea.

I can’t drive. 

I will use this post to explain tumblr

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Who’s the slowpoke taking 45 minutes to reach another McDonald’s in America? There are parts of the US where it’s less than a five-minute walk from one Maccie-Ds to the next.

darksigyn:

mattg124:

angrynerdyblogger:

straight-up-juggahos:

kendralynora:

buginateacup:

jaydenw:

whitepajamas:

automatonic-absinthe:

isaia:

rosswoodpark:

time-for-maps:

this changes everything oh my god

do you understand why it trips me out that people can drive 45 minutes and be in aNOTHER COUNTRY?

I drive for 45 minutes and im like

a city over 

I live in “Italy” and took a day trip to go to “Austria” and “Germany”

 #it is literally impossible to leave texas #you will be in texas #FOREVER

Chums, that’s sweet, and all, but Australia just ate Texas for breakfast. 

image

If you drive for 45 minutes in Australia you aren’t a city over, you’re just 45 minutes away from the city.

If you drive for 45 minutes in Australia you may not even leave the cattle station.

image

If you drive for 45 minutes in Canada you may not even leave your driveway.

If I drive 45 minutes in the us I’m just at another mcdonalds

If I drive for 45 minutes in Northern Ireland I’m 10 minutes into the sea.

I can’t drive. 

I will use this post to explain tumblr

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Who’s the slowpoke taking 45 minutes to reach another McDonald’s in America? There are parts of the US where it’s less than a five-minute walk from one Maccie-Ds to the next.

If the Founding Fathers had any common sense, they’d have held off on finalizing the Declaration of Independence until October at the absolute earliest. Then, the following year, the night sky would have set the perfect scene for the fireworks displays that would ensue. But no – it was the summer, and they just wanted to get the damned thing wrapped up so they could go swimming and eat ice-cream sandwiches. Bastards.
BenPaddon.net: “Boom, Boom, Boom, Boom
stfuconservatives
lacigreen:

hellyeahsafesex:

STD stats

hey bible belt, looks like that abstinence only education is workin out real well for you down there.

Ad agencies and infographic designers seem to think everybody living in America is American. Which is fine, because it means I’m not at risk of any STDs while I’m in the country. Result!
Downside? Nobody cares about my preferred make and model of car. There’s no way to make “Millions of Americans and one British guy love the Chevy Volt” sound enticing.

lacigreen:

hellyeahsafesex:

STD stats

hey bible belt, looks like that abstinence only education is workin out real well for you down there.

Ad agencies and infographic designers seem to think everybody living in America is American. Which is fine, because it means I’m not at risk of any STDs while I’m in the country. Result!

Downside? Nobody cares about my preferred make and model of car. There’s no way to make “Millions of Americans and one British guy love the Chevy Volt” sound enticing.